On Children and Sex Education…
As a parent,it is quite common to wonder how soon we should introduce our kids to sex education and what information is age appropriate.
My kids are 8 and 4 years old,My daughter, Nicole is the older one,my son,Obaloluwa is obviously the 4 year old. I have been faced with this dilemma several times,wondering how much information is ‘too much information’ and how to know when a child is ready for certain information. So I decided to let them take the lead,this guides me in some way as it lets me know by the questions they ask what they are ‘ready’ for and what their peers are talking about. However ,in letting them take the lead,they must be comfortable with you enough to ask questions and you must also be sensitive enough to know when to probe further.

When Nicole was 6 years,I had just had my bath and she came into my room,and asked me,mummy,I have been wondering,this sanitary pad you buy every month,what do you do with it? I froze! A lot of things ran through my head in a split second,what do I say?erm, how exactly do I say it? so I turned round and faced her,then I explained menstruation in the simplest way I could muster, she listened attentively and asked me,you mean blood comes out of your vagina? I said yes,she said wow,that is disgusting! She went on to ask at what age I started,I said 11,she thought about it,nodded and said,I don’t think I would want to start till I am 16. I smiled and she said thanks mum and left.
Sometime back,my son came to me and asked me,mummy,do you have a penis? Kai!He had asked me this question once before o,so I said no,Oba,I do not have a penis. He said so what do you have? ERM,I said,I have a vagina, he said agina?Nicole quipped,no Va,it is called va-jai-na. Ah I didn’t even know where to keep my face at this point. Her brother then responds, okay,I want a ‘Vangina ‘too, Nicole says no Oba,you cannot have one,God made boys to have a private part called penis,and girls to have vaginas. While he was pondering on this information, I asked Nicole about her home work and the story book she wanted me to get for her, this turned our conversation in a different direction. I could not handle anymore questions on private parts.
The first time Oba asked this same question,he asked if he could see when I said I had a vagina, I was not expecting that so I had to go on and on about what I taught him about his private parts and how they belong to him and God. So I said ,you should not ask people to show you their private parts,it is wrong. He said okay,sorry mum.
Phew! I have had to answer some of the most difficult questions,I have just learnt to take each day as it comes and also ensure my responses are age appropriate.
I let them know their body parts and the name each part is called,no funny names or weird names for privates for me. It was uncomfortable at first but not anymore.
As parents,sex education is a duty we owe our kids. Is it comfortable? Most of the time,no,is it necessary?Absolutely! If you do not give your children age appropriate sex education, the ‘world’ will do it for you and the results may be catastrophic.
Image culled from pinterest