Hey there!

How are you?

I know! It has been quite a year and the past couple of weeks have been a real trial in every way. I do not want to dwell on that right now,It is depressing to say the least.

Today,let’s talk about things that foster intimacy in your relationship with your spouse. I have been wanting to talk about this for a while but …🙈

When I was in secondary school,I had this friend that I had never seen her parents do anything together or even have a conversation. It was really strange to me and I kept thinking in my teenage mind how one can be happy being like this in a marriage?

I have still come across these type of situations as an adult and it bothers me that quite a number of couples are still bashful or some type of way with their spouses.
I’ll just talk about some of the things that we do often that have helped foster intimacy with Mike and I.

Talking/gisting is one of those things that we do often. We talk about any and everything. The more you talk,the better you are able to relate with and understand each other. We also try to be as open and honest with each other as possible. This basic helped us to no end. I can always honestly tell Mike how I feel at every point in time and I know he can do same.

Openness and honesty fosters trust and intimacy. Another thing on our list is bathing together. As simple as it sounds,it is one thing that let’s you know that you are comfortable with each other’s bodies and two have indeed become one and are naked without shame.😁 Bathing together is a win-win,you can actually have a lot of fun with it and it always gets things started…

I once had this discussion with a friend,when I was close to my EDD ,she adviced that I try to shave before going to the hospital, told her Mike had already done the honours. She was mortified🤣🤣 She said you mean you opened your legs for your husband to shave you and I said but I opened it for him to put the baby there na. LOL.
I actually like being shaved by Mike,sometimes we take turns and we get silly with it, it is alot of fun and also helps your sex life too.

Kissing is a great way to get close to your spouse. It helps not just your physical but also your emotional connection. Mike and I have different love languages. His is physical touch,mine is quality time,what better way to fill each other’s love tank than to spend quality time kissing😁

Another thing that works,believe it or not is praying together,we pray as a family,us and the kids but Mike and I also try to find time to pray together just us,it is not as often as I would like as I prefer praying at night,Mike prefers morning. However,we still find time to agree in prayers.

Sleeping naked,cuddling up and ‘spooning’is another way to get close to your partner. It is not always about sex. This is one of the major reasons why I find it really difficult to sleep when Mike is out of town,I miss the warmth and hardness of his body,we don’t sleep in a huge bed but it feels like a huge field when he is not around.

Dancing and playing together. I am talking sensual dance not ‘papa and mama’ dance that both of you will be socially and physically distant.😅 When we started having kids,it was really hectic at first to even get time to bond,but we started making conscious efforts to do things like this together when the kids are in bed. Dancing,just staying in each other’s arms quietly and drawing strength from each other.

Spending quality time together is also important. That is time alone as a couple,going out on dates,even exercising together. We have been meaning to go out to a hotel just the two of us to spend a weekend for the past couple of years but we have either not been able to spare the money or the timing is just not right. We go out on dates once in a while . We do a family outing and then just the two of us.

On one particular outing,the kids were away on holidays,he picked me up and we went to this place where we wanted to just hang out for a bit together but the music was too loud and we could not even talk,so we took our hanging out to our house and played truth or dare while we ate grilled fish and drank. We danced late into the night. It was fun.

Last but by no means the least is massages,hmmm…see ehn,I have been wanting a professional,correct ogbonge massage for a while now but I would prefer a male masseur but you see Ogbeni Mike,he does not want another man’s hands on me o😅. That was how one day like that he decided that since I want male masseur,let him do it,that one is story for another day🤭

There might or might not be a follow up post to this one😊 I’ll just stop here.

Remember,your happiness is dependent on you,be good to yourself.

❤Yetunde





Photo Credit: @Kelbpics / www.pinterest.com