I am at that point where I just feel like there are too many things happening in my head and in my life at the same time. I find it funny when I tell people that I do not want anymore kids and they think it is just talk,no,it is not just talk,it is actually because I do not think I have the capacity to be a mom to more than 2 children. I love kids,I love to see many children playing in one place,screaming,laughing and having fun but I like that at the end of everyday,let every child return to their own mother ,weird right?*chuckles*
So,as a mother to an 8 year old girl and a 4 year old boy,I take my responsibilities very seriously, however I am constantly scared of making mistakes in bringing up my kids, for instance,right now,my daughter is just at the beginning of puberty and it scares me to no end. I came in from work late that day and Nicole walks up to me and says “mummy,my breast is paining me”, Jesus! I froze and managed to ask,let me see it,paining you how?then she said touch it,it is hard and painful, I panicked and started stuttering. Erm give me a few minutes, I went into our room and realized I had gone into panic mode, I got some warm water and actually massaged lightly to try and ease the pain,erm please don’t ask me if that was the right thing to do o,I have no idea!
After Nicole had gone to bed, I said to Mike,I hope she is not growing breasts?he started laughing and said of course you know she is growing breasts,didn’t you say you also started growing breasts at 8 too?I blurted out,I am not ready for this! Truth is,one is never really ready for anything.

That night,I could not sleep,I was too scared to,I was worried, worried about puberty,worried about my little baby that I was not ready to see grow so quickly,worried that I can’t watch her everyday,I got up and read everything I could find on puberty,I had been giving her some basic sex education and all that but this is the real deal, I summoned up courage the next morning and talked to her about puberty,I tried to be as matter of fact about it as I could be but Nicole did not make it any easier,she is naturally a very inquisitive person and she kept bombarding me with questions, arrgh! This mummyhood is not easy o.
Now,I have talked to her about the physical changes and what to expect but I am quaking already wondering what is the age appropriate sex education to give her at this point. I am sha trying my best and hoping that I am able to bring her up to be the beautiful,well rounded young lady I want her to be. Dear Lord,please help me.
Erm,I don’t even know how I feel about this stage of being a mum o. Please all of my friends that are hoping mistake will happen and I will fall pregnant and have another baby,pregnancy fall on you there!
And when it falls on you,remember to be happy…he he he

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